Attitude

This week's resolution is "to have a positive attitude in all situations".  Based an my initial assessment, this is something I need to work on.  Based on my reading, this is something I need to work on.  The problem I have is that depending on how you frame "positive attitude", I'm not sure I really want to change.

Much of the reading I have done describes this positive attitude as some kind of "fake it 'til you make it" psychology.  It involves envisioning yet-to-be accomplished goals, achieved possessions, and lifestyle options; or approaching each prospective sales call as if the sale is already made.  I remember some skit from long ago when a person would stare in the mirror each morning and say, "I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And doggone it, people like me."  This is not the direction I want to take with achieving my life's purpose.  

When I first started looking into the materials for the Life Leadership business, I saw a lot of references to envisioning the life you want to live, making visual reminders of your dream car, house, vacation, and lifestyle.  Each day, there was to be time spent connecting with that dream to stay focused and do the work necessary to make it happen. I was a little uncomfortable with the focus on material things, and the methods were more about "my will" than "thy will be done".  This concern was pounded home when I picked up a book from a friend called "Isaiah Decoded" and immediately started reading about the sin of IDOLATRY.  I don't know what else to call it.  Even Alma warned about setting our hearts on a course that might be well-intentioned, but uninspired.

   O that I were an angel, and could have the wish of mine heart, that I might go forth and speak with the trump of God, with a voice to shake the earth, and cry repentance unto every people!

Yea, I would declare unto every soul, as with the voice of thunder, repentance and the plan of redemption, that they should repent and come unto our God, that there might not be more sorrow upon all the face of the earth. (Alma 29:1-2)

What could possibly be wrong with a desire like this? Peace on Earth, missionary work, bringing souls unto Christ.  And yet he continues:

But behold, I am a man, and do sin in my wish; for I ought to be content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me.

 I ought not to harrow up in my desires, the firm decree of a just God, for I know that he granteth unto men according to their desire, whether it be unto death or unto life; yea, I know that he allotteth unto men, yea, decreeth unto them decrees which are unalterable, according to their wills, whether they be unto salvation or unto destruction.(Alma 29:3-4)

Now, seeing that I know these things, why should I desire more than to perform the work to which I have been called? (Alma 29:6)

The other concern I have with solely focusing on the positive is that there are usually real concerns that ought to be recognized so they can be planned for and worked with.  I think it was the book "Quiet" that talked about introverts and extroverts.  (I might be wrong about the source of this idea, but its a good book anyway.) There is a certain portion of any population that approaches life differently, that eats and sleeps with its senses alert for possible danger.  These "pessimists" provide an early warning when danger approaches - at the risk of a false alarm.  They recognize risk and try to mitigate it, or avoid it.  However, they pay a price in not being first to the scene of opportunity.

Having put my concerns first, I will say that I agree with the need to improve my attitude in all situations.  This is not about positive affirmations so much as identifying my thought patterns better.  Some of the things I have been reading and watching recently put a focus on awareness of my thought patterns.  What are my thoughts saying as they comment to me about myself and others? Do I expect to be disappointed or to disappoint others when completing tasks?  Do I attribute positive or negative motives to the things people do that might cause me inconvenience or even harm? When I am faced with a task I haven't chosen freely, do I decide to get the most out of it, or mentally grumble at the effort required?

I have started being able to laugh at some of the crazy things life throws at me and just call them "journal moments".  I have found that some of the hardest things I have faced in life have given me greater compassion and maturity, so I have learned to start looking for the blessings in trials.  I like being able to turn the negative channel in my thinking to "off".  I've heard there is nothing in this life so bad that complaining about it won't make it worse. In all of these areas I see room for personal improvement.  

Being alive is a blessing.  I love my life.  However, it is hard sometimes. I have heard that God will not give us one minute more pain than is necessary for the development we need to become like him. For me, having a positive attitude means recognizing there is a purpose to what I experience in life.  If I remember to let God accompany me on my journey, he can share the ups and downs, he can point out blessings along the way. It is pointless for me to blame others for my grief and suffering if God has allowed me a particular experience.  A positive attitude tells me "this too shall pass."